"I don't know... I don't think so. Not like the other times. It's not getting overwhelmed I'm worried about. I'm worried about losing perspective. I know that a lot of things are a lot worse than I thought they were, but now that I can look straight at it and accept that I don't want to go back to hiding.

Honestly I feel pretty good. Stuff here is weird and dangerous and... I don't know... maybe pretty dire, but the Sun is out, we're not dead and so far nothing indicates the fight is completely unwinnable. I'll take it.

I think the closest analogy I can think of is like one of those trees that they grow in a frame so it will take on some weird pretty shape. Once the tree is all grown it doesn't need the frame anymore. I'm strong on my own and I like who I am mostly. I don't like everyone I've been and I know how I got here was fucked up but the end result isn't so bad.

Now that the blinders are off I can choose where I grow but I have a decent foundation. That doesn't make the cause of all this right. It's not okay to do that kind of stuff to people just to mold them into what you want. But that also doesn't mean I don't get to own who I am and be happy with it. I'm worried if we were 'whisked back' that thick blanket of wet wool would layer itself around my brain again."