“I just need everything to go back to how it was.” Before Kon died, when it was a manageable crush. He’s had other crushes, and none of them crushed him like this.

But when Kon died, everything got blown out of proportion, and when his world finally started to clpiece itself back together, all the proportions were off, and the space in his heart for Kon was grotesquely out-sized and refuses to shrink. It’s his fault that things aren’t normal. That he can’t just goof off and be normal the way Kon wants. That he’s a freak. “I don’t need to go through it, I need to go back. I just need to try harder. I can be what he wants me to be again, and we can go back to how it was.”